From The Pastor

Brothers and sisters,
The last few weeks I have been on a journey. Not a literal, physical one — at least not yet. The journey has been interesting. I’ll be honest, my feelings have been hurt a couple times along the way, though I was warned ahead of time that would happen. But there’s been one line from this journey that has stuck with me and prompt-ed me to write this article. With that, let’s talk about my journey so far. Let’s talk about interior design.

You weren’t expecting that one, were you? Over the last few weeks, I’ve been looking around my apartment and trying to figure out how to make it feel homier, feel cozier, feel even a little stylish. I am a fairly stereotypical guy in that I have pictures and art and stuff like that—they just aren’t up on my wall yet. But I don’t know where to put stuff, how to arrange things, how to pick colors, etc. And that sense of not knowing has caused some creative paralysis. I’m not sure what to do, so I don’t do anything.

Enter Caroline. Caroline is an interior designer with a YouTube channel dedicated to helping people with the design of their homes. She did not go to design school, but she has turned her interest in interior design into a consulting business. She was a theatre major and it definitely shows! For the camera, she puts on a playfully judgy persona that is both aggressive and funny. As I alluded to earlier, she starts a lot of her videos by saying, “Listen. I’m going to hurt your feelings. Stay with me. I only want what’s best for you.” By the end of the video you feel like you’ve had a good talk with a close friend.

One of the things that I appreciate about Caroline’s videos is that she does not speak only in broad sweeping terms, she gets down to the nitty gritty of how to make de-sign changes. She appreciates bold choices, but advocates for making bold choices wisely (an oxymoron, I know, but she makes it make sense). But one thing that she says over and over in her videos stuck with me. When talking about designing a space, she constantly reminds her viewers, “Creativity requires failure. A lot of it. You tried the couch here and it didn’t work. Great! So, move it. That art didn’t look as good as you thought. Good thing you saved your receipt! Embrace those failures cause that’s how you find your voice.”

On its own, that line, “Creativity requires failure,” feels empowering to me. To be remind-ed by someone who knows what they’re doing (Caroline’s designs are always beautiful) that they failed a lot along their own journey is a reminder to us all that doing anything well takes time. It takes time not only in the sense of slowing down to make sure you’re doing good work, but also in the sense of allowing ourselves to fail, to learn from our failures, and to try again.

In a Christian sense, it is a reminder that all of us are going to fail when we try to live faithful lives. We will inevitably sin again. We will be short with a loved one when we needed to be patient. We will allow jealousy to cloud our judgment when we should have been happy for some-one else. We will give in to anger and hatred toward someone we don’t like when we should have looked for common ground built on mercy. Learning to be Christian requires humility. A lot of it. But God recognizes that. Embrace the grace God offers cause that’s how you learn to do better next time.

Grace and peace,
Pastor Ben

Brothers and sisters,

For this week’s Illuminator, I want to highlight a story I heard the other day of someone going way above and beyond to be kind to another person. While I don’t know the religious affiliations of anyone involved in this story, the thought and dedication to another person is something we Christians ought to emulate.

In Pocatello, Idaho, there was only one video rental store still in business, a place called Video Stop. Run by its owner, David Kraning, the store had been there for years. Kraning had actually taken over the business from his father years ago, but his profits had taken a huge tumble due to the rise of streaming services like Netflix. Within the last year or so, Kraning finally came to the difficult decision that he needed to close the store. Video Stop closed on February 1st this year. He was losing money on it and had been for a while, but there was a reason he’d kept it open even when it wasn’t turning a profit.

Christina Cavanaugh is the Video Stop’s most loyal customer. She also has Down syndrome and is mostly non-verbal. As part of her weekly routine, Christina and her mother, Toni, would come to the video store three times per week and that has been going on for the last fifteen years. Christina loves Disney movies, especially Mulan and Hercules, and it brings her a sense of order and security to have these excursions to the video store. She also gets to work on life skills while she’s there—picking what she wants, interacting with cashiers, presenting cash, and thanking the cashier. It’s an important part of her life.

When Kraning realized he needed to close the store, he said that he was upset not just because of the death of the business, but he was worried about how it would affect Christina. Routines are extremely important for folks struggling with disorders like Down syndrome. As it happens, Kraning also owns the convenience store next door. So, as February 1st approached, Kraning cleared out a corner of his convenience store and set up shelves from Video Stop. He then stocked them with about 200 videos—50 Disney movies for Christina and his next 150 top rentals. His employees christened the display, “Christina’s Corner.”

One day, when Toni came to the convenience store, Kraning showed her Christina’s Corner and Toni said she burst into tears, barely able to thank him. “David is such a humble person, and he’s usually very quiet. I had no idea he’d been worrying about how closing the shop would affect Christina. I thought, ‘My gosh—he’s been losing money, but he came up with a plan just for my daughter?’ Who knew this guy’s heart was so big?” Regarding all this, Kraning said, “It felt good to know that Toni could continue to bring Christina in. I wanted to do something nice for them both. I knew there had probably been some struggles over the years.”

May we all look out for our neighbors the way he looked out for Christina.

Grace and peace,
Pastor Ben

Brothers and sisters,

Within the last couple of months, I’ve joined two book clubs over in Chapel Hill. One of them is less traditional; it’s a Silent Book Club. Basically, a bunch of people come to a local bookstore, we all read different books separately for an hour, then we come together for about 30 minutes of discussion where we introduce ourselves, our book, and something interesting about it. Essentially, once a month, everyone in the Silent Book Club gets a list of recommendations from other readers!

The other book club I’m part of is set up in a more traditional way. We have a book that we read each month. Then, we come together at a different local bookstore, drink coffee, and talk about the book we read. This club, in particular, is a fantasy book club, meaning we read fantasy books. Last month’s book was about a scientist who studies faeries (highly recommend!) and this month’s was about a pawn shop in a different dimension (medium recommend). I want to talk briefly about the core question this month’s book, Water Moon, asks — how do our choices affect our character?

Let me give you the quickest summary of Water Moon’s premise. Hana, the main character, lives with her father in a pawn shop in a different dimension. At their pawn shop, Hana’s father buys people’s choices; that is, he buys any sense of guilt or uncertainty that their choices have burdened them with. On the morning when Hana was meant to take over the pawn shop from her father, she awakens to find the shop ran-sacked, her father missing, one of the choices they’d bought stolen, and a strange man named Kei standing there asking her to make a choice rather than seeking to pawn one of his own. From there Hana and Kei set off on a journey across her world to find her father, locate the missing choice, and set things right.

As I mentioned earlier, the novel asks the question, “How do our choices affect our character?” Throughout the story, Hana and Kei must choose certain actions, face the consequences, and reckon with what that means for their identities. As a Christian, it brought to mind the way our Christian identities are formed. Often, particularly as Baptists, we think about one choice that a person makes — the choice to come down the aisle, profess our faith in Christ, and be baptized. But to be a Christian is to spend our lives making choices. When someone is hurting, we must choose whether or not we will help them. When we are faced with anger or aggression, we must choose how we will respond. When we are facing injustice ourselves or are made aware of injustice elsewhere, we must choose what we will do. All these choices have the possibility to make us into better Christians. Will we regularly choose the path of Jesus, even though it is hard? Or will we take the path of least resistance. There is an old saying that gets misattributed to Aristotle that says, “We are what we repeatedly do … therefore excellence is not an act, but a habit.” I largely agree with that, though I’ll amend it for a Christian context, “We are what we repeatedly do…therefore to be Christ-like is not an act, but a habit.” May we get in the habit of acting faithfully, becoming more like Jesus each day.

Grace and peace,
Pastor Ben

Brothers and sisters,
Valentine’s Day is this week. In previous years, I’ve taken this Illuminator article to reflect on love or tell a story about Valentinus, the saint the holiday is named after. But today, I want to keep it simple because, at its core, love is simple. Love is caring about another human being. Love is believing that another person deserves to be treated well, with dignity and respect. Our ability to love others comes from God and we Christians are called to love others.

So, rather than fill up a page with random thoughts I have about love or funny things I found on the internet, I’m just going to give you some suggestions of things you can do to remind others they are loved:

• Go to dinner with someone special to you and pick up the tab.
• Call a friend or family member and check in. Be sure to tell them, “I love you.”
• I’ve said this one a lot, but it’s always true—go out of your way to thank a service worker today.
• Consider making a donation to a charity that works with folks in need (any organization that works with refugees could use help right now).
• Treat yourself (remember that Jesus taught we are to love our neighbors as we love ourselves; so, show yourself some love)!
• Spend some time with God—it’s never a bad idea to ponder the love of God.

Grace and peace,
Pastor Ben

Brothers and sisters,

It’s that time of year again. Super Bowl Sunday is quickly approaching! When I watch stuff on YouTube, I’m getting ads that say, “See the full version February 9th during the Super Bowl!” So, understand, that means I’m getting a commercial that advertises an upcoming commercial! And, of course, the matchup for the Big Game has been set—a rematch of Super Bowl LVII, the Philadelphia Eagles vs. the Kansas City Chiefs with the Chiefs chasing three Super Bowl wins in a row, a feat never accomplished in NFL history.

However, earlier that day, our church will be pursuing its own kind of repeat. On Sunday, February 9th, immediately following worship, we will be hosting our second consecutive Souper Bowl of Caring luncheon! Kathryn and others in our church have been planning this event for a while now and it sounds like it’s going to be a wonderful time! We’ve already got lots of different kinds of soups coming—chilis, chowders, and even a vegetarian option! We’ve got sandwiches coming, too, as well as a variety of desserts. All this will be happening in our Fellowship Hall. Everyone is invited—if you come to worship, if you don’t come to worship, if you brought something, if you didn’t bring something, family, friends—again, everyone!

We are not charging anything for lunch, but we will be accepting monetary donations (cash, check, or card) and all donations will be split between two organizations we’ve partnered with in the past: Urban Ministries of Durham and Baptists on Mission. Just in case you’re not familiar with what all they’re doing, let me tell you a little bit about each one.

Urban Ministries has a mission statement on their website that reads, “Urban Ministries of Durham connects with the community to end homelessness and fight poverty by offering food, shelter and a future to neighbors in need.” The list of ways they help our community is impressive. They provide shelter. They have a clothing closet. They have a food pantry. They provide three meals a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year to folks in need. And, having gone with volunteers to deliver food for our ACC Tournament Food Drive (more details on that in the weeks to come), I can honestly tell you that they do connect with the people they serve. They are a wonderful resource for our neighbors in need and a great partner in ministry.

Baptists on Mission continues to do good, long, difficult work in the western part of our state. Hurricane Helene may have hit four months ago, but the recovery effort is still ongoing. There are still folks out in western North Carolina who are without the basics—water, shelter, electricity. Volunteers have poured in from all over the state, but the geography of the mountains makes it such that everything is just a little bit more difficult than you’d think. That being said, Baptists on Mission is committed to staying and helping the people for as long as it takes. So, it makes sense to do what we can to continue to support their efforts.

So, on February 9th, come eat soup, sandwiches, and desserts. Fellowship with your brothers and sisters here at Hope Valley. And consider making a donation to help our neighbors here in Durham and in western North Carolina! Also, go Eagles!

Grace and peace,
Pastor Ben

Brothers and sisters,

It’s hard to believe, but we are nearly three weeks into January! It feels like Christmas was a week ago! Regardless, I wanted us to start out the new year with a new sermon series—one that asks a simple question. Now, you may see the title of this article and think, “Shouldn’t the pastor already know the answer to that question?” And, yes, I do know who Jesus is! But I wanted us to take some time here at the beginning of the year to look at passages from early on in Jesus’ ministry. These moments, mostly from Luke’s gospel, are keys to understanding the overarching point of Jesus’ ministry. They set up Jesus’ identity and give us some insight into how he viewed his own mission.

In many ways, this will be a “back-to-the-basics” type of series, but I think it’s good from time to time to reexamine those basics, to understand the principles so much of our faith is built on. I’m re- minded of when I was in middle school and high school math classes. I was fortunate enough to have math teachers that would take the time to break down why certain formulas or equations worked. So, we did exercises where we broke down why the area of a triangle is ½ base times height or why the Pythagorean Theorem works. Because those teachers took the time to break those things down, we had a much better understanding of why the math was working out, how the math was working out, and how we could use it in creative ways to solve problems.

By reexamining some of the basics of Jesus’ ministry, my hope is that we can come to a better understanding of why he did the things he did, how his ministry was able to build others up, why it is still relevant to us today, and how we can apply the principles of his ministry to our everyday lives. I’m looking forward to going through these passages together and seeing what we can discover!

Grace and peace,
Pastor Ben

Brothers and sisters,

By the time y’all read this, 2024 will be a thing of the past! I know this is cliché to say, but, depending on when you ask me, Thanksgiving feels like it was either just yesterday or six months ago! In a similar way, as I sit here writing this on Tuesday, there is a part of me that thinks, “Wait—2024 is already over?!” and there is a part of me that thinks, “Oh, thank goodness! 2024 has lasted forever!” Regardless, we’ve done a lot over the last year, so I want to take this space in the Illuminator to recap some of the stuff we’ve done together.
Throughout this year, we have taken on a bunch of different missions projects, doing our best to live out the call God has placed on us as a church—to be the hands and feet of Jesus. This year, we’ve participated in Operation Inasmuch—cleaning yards, making goodie bags for teachers, and supply bags for our homeless neighbors. We’ve collected new and gently used clothing items for the clothes closet over at Parkwood Elementary. We’ve partnered with Scarlette Jasper and Olive Branch Ministries to help provide Christmas to poor children in rural Appalachia. And we’ve collected money, winter clothes, and other basic supplies for folks out west devastated by Hurricane Helene, including putting together 16 Disaster Relief Cleanup Buckets.

We’ve also reached out to our local community this year to remind them that we see them, we love them, and God loves them too. We put on our annual Easter Egg Hunt and Crafting Fair, inviting local families to come and learn more about the resurrection of Jesus and the depths of God’s love for them. We had another summer of Super Saturday Adventures, teaching local kids about the parables of Jesus, showing them how church comes together as a community, and helping them participate in missions projects to help people here in Durham. We had our annual Fall Festival with Trunk-or-Treat, another reminder to our community that we love them, but also a reminder that our God is a joyful God—that means we ought to celebrate whenever we can!

We’ve also had wonderful times of fellowship this year. February saw our Souper Bowl of Caring, when we all brought pots of chili and/or fixings and/or desserts to raise money for the Food Bank of Central and Eastern NC. We had our Summer Send-Off Ice Cream Social this year around Labor Day. And, more recently, we had our Advent/Christmas Craft Workshop where folks were able to come and make crafts for themselves and others in our community.

Finally, we had special services throughout the year. Leena Levanya came and spoke to our church about her ministry in India. World Relief Durham came and told us more about the work they do with refugees here in the Triangle. We had our Hanging of the Greens and “The Candles of Christmas” during Advent, in addition to our Christmas Eve service. Best of all, we celebrated three baptisms this year—Gary and Victoria Finch, and Ron Parker.
Believe it or not, that is not all we did—I just ran out of space! 2024 has been a busy year, but a very good year too. May we enter 2025 with as much passion for God’s call on our church. May we seek God faithfully as a church family.

Happy New Year,
Pastor Ben

Earlier this year, I admitted one of my shortcomings to you all—I do not get poetry. I have tried and tried. I’ve tried simple stuff. I’ve tried classics. My friends who are English teachers have tried to help me and have given up in the process!

That being said, every now and then a poem comes along that I get. It’s a snapshot of a moment or a feeling that makes sense to me. At this time last year, I left you all with a poem in the Illuminator and I figured I’d do that again. I love the way that Ted Kooser captures the connection between our Christmas celebrations today and the original Christmas two thousand years ago, seeing it through the eyes of a mail carrier. Enjoy and Merry Christmas!

Christmas Mail
By Ted Kooser
Cards in each mailbox,
angel, manger, star and lamb,
as the rural carrier,
driving the snowy roads,
hears from her bundles
the plaintive bleating of sheep,
the shuffle of sandals,
the clopping of camels.
At stop after stop,
she opens the little tin door
and places deep in the shadows
the shepherds and wise men,
the donkeys lank and weary,
the cow who chews and muses.
And from her Styrofoam cup,
white as a star and perched
on the dashboard, leading her
ever into the distance,
there is a hint of hazelnut,
and then a touch of myrrh.

Accessed via https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/55886/christmas-mail, on December 11, 2024.

Brothers and sisters,

I wanted to write to you all this week and give you a quick run-down of everything happening at our church during the Advent season—cause there’s a lot!

First, on Sunday, December 1st, we will be having our usual Hanging of the Greens service during morning worship. The Hanging of the Greens is a traditional service that acts as the official beginning of Advent. During the service, we will reflect on what the symbols of Advent mean and how they connect to the story of Jesus’ birth. This is always a beautiful service with lots of participation from the congregation, so come and bring in the Advent season with us!

Then, on December 7th, from 3:00-5:00, Frances Smith and others will be leading an Advent Craft Workshop. There is an announcement with more details in this newsletter, so be sure to read through it. If you have any questions, be sure to contact Frances. Everyone is invited to come and participate in this event! Come on out and make something for Christmas!

On December 8th, we will have our usual Sunday morning worship, but we will celebrate the Lord’s Supper this Sunday.

Next, on December 15th during morning worship, we will have our Christmas musical service, “The Candles of Christmas”, with a reception in the Fellowship Hall after-ward. If you have not been to one of these musical services in the past, I highly recommend you come! The music is beautiful, the readings are inspiring, and the food is delicious! Do yourself a favor and mark your calendar for this one!

Finally, we will have our Christmas Eve Communion and Candlelight Service on Tuesday, December 24th at 5:00 PM in the sanctuary. After all the hustle and bustle that comes with the Christmas season, this service always serves as a time of respite. At this service, we will celebrate the birth of Jesus, remember his sacrifice, and ponder the great mystery of Immanuel, “God with us.” This service always ends with us singing “Silent Night” by the light of candles—a perfect way to finish the season of Advent.

I look forward to seeing you all at each of these events!

Grace and peace,

Pastor Ben

Brothers and sisters,
November is a unique time of the year—in my opinion. It’s a month that so often gets overshadowed by its neighbors. October dominates the beginning of fall with fairs and football and, of course, Halloween. December then dominates the end of the year with, obviously, Christ-mas taking up a tremendous amount of our attention before ceding some ground to New Year’s Eve. November does have Thanksgiving, but if you put Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas in a popularity contest—I couldn’t tell you who’d win first, but I could tell you who’d win third.

That being said, November offers this interesting opportunity for us all to rest. It feels almost like taking a deep breath. The mischief and mayhem of Halloween has passed. The joyful busyness of Christmas has yet to set in. And in between those two is this month where the temperatures begin to drop more consistently, the sun goes down earlier, and we’re all encouraged to begin settling in for a cozy, comfy winter. I like the change of pace November offers.

A couple of Illuminators ago, I argued that part of the reason we were putting on something like the Fall Festival was because God exists in a state of joy and celebration. I believe that. But I also believe that God recognizes the limitations we human beings have. We cannot constantly celebrate. We cannot constantly go from party to party. Nor can we constantly go from mission to mission to mission. Instead, we have to take time to rest, to be with the people who fill us up, to do the things that give us life. There’s scripture to back that.

Remember that in Mark’s gospel, Jesus sent his disciples out two by two in order to spread the good news of the gospel. He gave them authority that they might heal the people they met. After that ministry came to an end, the disciples gathered around Jesus and began to tell them all about what they’d done. Jesus, hearing it all, says this to the disciples, “Come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest awhile” (Mark 6:31). Jesus recognized that the disciples needed a moment to catch their breath, to recharge their batteries. They needed time to just be together.

So, this November, do the things that bring you life. Meet up with the people that fill you up. Take some time to rest and enjoy this time of the year. The temperatures will be pleasant. The leaves will be beautiful. The football will be good. And in all of it, give thanks to God.

Grace and peace,
Pastor Ben